Batsh*t Bride

Heather

Bryce

Paul

Becky

Cindy

Gretchen

Mr. Papadopoulos

Pandora

Richard

Mrs. Rodriguez

Maria

Theresa

Gary

Guillaume

Cheryl

Drunk Homeless Guy

That Other Homeless Guy

Aunt Suzannah

Grandfather Christos

Great-Grandmother Adonia

Nancy

Bobby

Sarah

Waiter